Healing Blog

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sadxmasDear Cynthia:
It is the holiday season and this will be my first Christmas without my children. I am lost and depressed. I am not sure how I will get through this tough time. I can’t imagine a Christmas without my kids. Signed – Santa Stinks

Dear Santa Stinks:

I know how you feel. The first holiday I spent without my children was very depressing. I can recommend a few things to help you through this time. But, know, that you are allowed to be sad and grieve this loss of the holidays/traditions of the past in your life. Once you allow yourself to grieve the old ways you can move on to create NEW traditions for the many holidays to come.

I encourage you to sit with your children and come up with some new traditions around the holidays. Getting their input on everything from the meals, decorations, songs, movies, and even when you open presents. Preserve the best of what was and add in some new, fun ways to celebrate. Whether it’s different color lights, getting a real or fake tree, adding the kids favorite dish to the holiday meal, opening presents Christmas Eve or the day after Christmas, or having a holiday movie night – now is your chance to re-define your Christmas YOUR way.

Depending on the custody schedule, you can call, Skype or Face Time your kids when they are not with you. You can put a special card in your kids’ bags to open while celebrating with your ex. Whatever you do, don’t hermit and hide. Force yourself to get dressed and out of the house! It might be the last thing you want to do – but you will thank yourself later.

I will be thinking and praying for you and all the other parents who have just gone through divorce this holiday season.

In this column Cynthia will answer your emotionally based and general questions about divorce. Cynthia is a life coach and energy worker who specializes in working with people considering, going through, or stuck after divorce.

To ask Cynthia a question about divorce, you can email her at: cindy@transform-heal.com.

You can also email Bliss Magazine: editor@blissmagazine.net



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Tuesday, December 12, 2015 at 19:18 pm and is
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